Saturday, September 3, 2011

On this day.....

So it's that time of year.... a time to celebrate another American tradition.... Labor Day.... I am not in the work force, and on that day the kids are home, so I actually have more "labor"..... and so do the girls... gonna put them to work, hahahaha!!! being the mean mom that I am.... And the only other labor that I could be celebrating is childbirth labor.... That was pure HELL!!! It was THAT bad!!!! I wouldn't go back and not have them, but I would go back and have had planned C-sections with BOTH of them.... the only problem with that type of "labor" celebration is that from that wonderful beautiful moment I brought my wonderful daughters into this world (thank You Lord for them), I have been working ever since.... now I gotta teach my (way too beautiful) 15 yr. old to drive, then there's boys.... oh, boy!!!! That's a whole other blog tho..... =)

I am now a 35 year old woman...... it seems a life-time ago I met, fell in love with, and married my (ex)husband.... I was 16 when we met and he was 20. We had our 1st date right before my 17th birthday (his 21st) and we dated a year and a half and married.... about 2 years later we had our first daughter, 3 yrs 8 months later we had our 2nd daughter. We both knew that we only wanted 2 children and God blessed us immensely more than I could have ever dreamed or imagined! I was 20 when I had my first daughter and JUST turned  when I had my youngest. My whole world has been forever altered. As much as fibro has changed my life, having kids, woah! Completely turned it inside out and upside down and every way in between!! AND IT'S ALL WORTH IT!!! :D  Kids are my reason on this earth to keep going.... Without God I would be a mess, my girls.... they keep me going!! I love them soooo much.... they have no idea!!! I know that as they age and mature they will see it more.... I hope even more though is that as much as I love them, I hope and pray that they know God loves them even more!

Having kids, that's my occupation.... I used to be a wife... now, no.... I never thought for a million years that I would be here in this positon.... divorced, a single mom, failed relationship after relationship.... eeehhhh, it sucks..... If it weren't for God I don't know how people can get through anything in life... cuz it is REALLY   hard sometimes! I became a bride on this day, 17 years ago..... over half a lifetime... And today is Saturday no less.... I think I tried to put it aside, and honestly it has been easier this year, but rite now as I am blogging this I could cry... not because I want my marriage back, just sad to look at the losses, the rubble left behind, the kids, the scars, the hurts, the tears.... If I could go back in time and change things, I would.... and I know that "others" would too, but you can't turn back the hands of time.... you can only go forward... one way and one way only! time accelerates.... going, going, gone....

I know that God will see me through as He has sooo many times before! I pray that God will hold me and those that need Him on this day.... I pray that not only will you bless me and the girls, I also pray that you will bless their father and give him Your comfort and peace this day as well.... Help us all and thank You for being with us and guiding us on this new journey we are on.... Happy Anniversary M, I wish you all the best

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